love turns the wheels in my head

when you love somebody

I know down deep in my soul that tony is my true love. the one that was meant for me. why else would we be together and love each other so much? we are soul mates. i'm so lucky to be with him. we can talk about anything. 

i know we struggle sometimes but right now i feel so good about our love. 

today he had his first procedure done. i walked him home. he saw me right when he woke up. he was so happy to see me. but he still looked so scared. he didn't even know it was over yet. he was surprised. he was ready to go as soon as he woke up. i thought he was so sweet and precious. he was asleep when i walked in and i didn't wake him up at first. i thought he would just wake up but when i sat there for a minute it seemed like he could sleep there all night. but when the nurse woke him up he was amazing and beautiful and i was so proud to be his girlfriend. we are not going to give up until we find what is going on inside of him. i can't wait to find out so the pain can stop. whatever it is, i'm going to be on the battlefield fighting this thing. with my love. 

as we were walking to the hospital he told me he wanted me to know he loves me in case anything happens. i told him i love him too. he does love me and that it's it. 

we went to the new year's party and it was pretty fun. it was hard for us both to get in to it because of drama and shit talking mostly, but also because of tony's pain. 

tomorrow is saturday and we are going to church this weekend. i'm excited to go again. i don't ever want to miss another sunday. thank god tony wants to go with me.