so now i can look back on how alone i felt i just don't want to feel like that again. cheated. i guess i'm at a point where i can choose carefully how i want to behave in a situation such as this.
i'm falling. or, i've fallen. i feel like i'm still falling. so that's where i can watch myself. to see if i'm making some mistakes. i used to not care maybe that's the key to it. maybe i feel this way because i can still feel the hole in my heart. i don't want to do something that will mess this up. i have it soooo good with him. i'm just hoping and hoping that he feels this way about me. what can i do to help it??
i'm making small mistakes. i want to know the future. i wish to be someone with manners and someone with something to teach another.
i can't always do the right thing. even though i feel like each moment lasts a lifetime when i'm waiting, i have to make sure i take advantage of them all. my thoughts are important. how can i change them?? how can i become more? better? how can i progress? i'm so happy but i need to feel something new in myself to be satisfied with who i am. i want to have enough to say and to give. he said i should write a book. i can't believe my ears sometimes. sometimes i think i'm unworthy of such a man.
